Mallory and Peach

Just One of the Boys

2012-02-10T17:21:00.000-08:00

I used to think how lucky Masha is that she has two big brothers to protect her... Now I think how lucky they will be to have her as a backup :-)

Pictures as Promised

2011-12-28T20:09:00.000-08:00

Masha's First Year of Pre-K Graduation

Kimani "reading" to Autumn

Masha at soccer practice

Masha's twins

Autumn turns two

Double cold at the soccer tournament

Masha feeding the goats

The apple picking field trip

Upsidedown Autumn

The daddy train

Making gingerbread houses

Autumn playing piano

Princess Autumn blowing kisses to her fans

Now children, please tell Santa you want a nanny...

Christmas morning (minus Kimani who wouldn't stay in the picture)

Christmas stocking time

Masha our rock star in training

Autumn understood the whole present thing this year

Autumn and grandpa

The Bad Adoptive Mom

2011-12-13T07:24:00.000-08:00

Masha calls me mama , and some days it almost feels that way. (It might feel more real if she would stop calling my husband “mama” too, but that is another story.)

We adopted because I couldn’t stand looking at all those faces on Reece’s Rainbow and knowing what fate awaited them if people didn’t stand up and claim them. Every day a tiny voice would say to me, “Imagine if that was Kimani.” I felt achingly sorry for those unwanted children.

We adopted because once it occurred to us that we could, to ignore it, to refuse it, felt dirty. Once you realize you can do something right, something good, how can you eschew it without guilt?

I did not adopt because I wanted a bigger family, or because I saw Peach’s face and fell in love. In fact, it was baby Arina that wormed her way into my heart and then disappeared forever. Peach was the consolation prize. And Masha? What was she? The unplanned for bonus prize that we accepted because to not save a human life for the mere cost of an extra 6k seemed horrible?

Ok, right about now you might be thinking that I am a secretly evil person who should have never been granted two adoptive daughters, but bear with me because I am telling you all this for very good reasons.

First off, because it is the truth. I wish I could have been the adoptive mom who fell hopelessly in love before ever even meeting the child. The adoptive mom who sucks up her new child’s essence and churns out biological love responses from it.

After committing to Peach we got her full cardiac medical records and shared them with our cardiologist here. He said her unrepaired heart defect was destroying her lungs. Letting a defect like that go past a year old would be sealing her fate of a slow death (about 5-8 years). Who knew how much damage was already done. I felt sick. What had we gotten into?

Each day of the adoption process I carried on as if I were pregnant with the perfect child. I shopped, set things up, presented the perfect picture... after all, who the heck would donate to the adoption fund if they knew I was terrified inside and unsure about it all.

Was I lying? Well, maybe... but without that outward vision and your corresponding encouraging support, I may have crumbled.

Thankfully, I didn’t crumble. Because every morning I am greeted by Masha’s song, the one she sings at the top of her lungs in her crib. It has to do with Kimani, and something about being pretty, and something about “baby girl”... I haven’t quite determined all the lyrics but it is a love song for sure. And in the other room there is a little darling standing up in her crib with a smile bigger than her face. She calls out to me to come get her. And when I do I am rewarded with a face full of kisses.

I wish I could say it felt biological this love I have for them. I wish their boogers and poo didn’t gross me out. I wish I had memories of them that went all the way back to the womb. But really in the grand scheme of things, does that truly make me a bad adoptive mom? I don’t know for sure, and really I don’t care. Years from now the memories will blur, they will wipe their own noses, and my heart will no longer be able to tell which ones grew under it.

I love them... my Masharoo and The Babygirl. Their siblings love them. My husband loves them. Their aunts, uncles, and grandparents love them. We are family.

I told you this because somewhere out there is someone who feels like I felt. Someone who wants to adopt but is afraid of not being able to handle it. Someone who wants to save a child but doesn’t feel very motherly toward the pictures she sees on the Internet. To her I would say, don’t say no just because you aren’t bursting with Yes. Maybe you won’t follow your heart, but instead you will follow your head, and that’s ok.

Somewhere out there is a mom like me who already adopted and feels like she is a bad adoptive mom. She feels like she is raising someone else’s child and wonders why it can’t feel natural. To her I would say, love is action. So long as you are treating your child with love, it doesn’t matter to him what dark fears and reservations lurk in your heart. And one day you’ll see clearly that everything is alright.

p.s. Autumn is healthy and her lungs are perfectly fine, and next time I promise you pictures, lots and lots of pictures.

She's Crazy

2011-07-30T15:07:00.000-07:00

Who Are These Girls?

2011-07-26T08:24:00.000-07:00

Ten months later one might believe they are different children...

Masha's Box

2011-04-20T07:13:00.000-07:00

If you have been following this blog, then you got to see lots of pictures of the orphanage where Masha lived. The grounds were well cared for, with a dilapidated swing, apple trees, and benches. You also saw the visiting area with the brown couch and mirrored pillar in the center of the room.

What you did not see was Masha’s sleeping quarters or where she spent the majority of her time in the living/play space designated to her “groupa”. On our last day there, I asked if I could take pictures of her living area so she would have them to always remember her beginnings. They graciously allowed me to do this.

I did not have the guts to ask if I could take a picture of the bedroom. It was a plain space filled with box cribs. There seemed to be no good reason to want a picture of it considering how sparse and sad a room it was. So to my husband’s chagrin, I snuck a picture of it.

All this time I have wondered which box was Masha’s. Yesterday Masha and I were looking through pictures of Vorzel on my computer and we came across her bedroom picture. She said something to me in Masha-speak. So I asked her, “where does Masha sleep?” and I signed sleep. Masha reached out and touched a bed on the screen.

I was shocked. Did she know what I was asking? I asked again... “Masha go night-night? Where does Masha go night-night?” Once again she pointed to the same crib. The one in the back along the wall... the center one.

I laughed to myself... yes it made sense that she would be in the crib with the least access to her neighbors considering how she plays with Kimani every morning...waking her up and getting into mischief. They would have wanted to keep this social butterfly as separated as possible.

The part about all this that is awesome for me is that Masha told me something I didn’t already know. My little darling has come a long way.

School Picture

2011-04-15T06:36:00.000-07:00

Masha is so photogenic. She is lovely in real life, but stunning on camera. I can't wait to send her grandmother in Ukraine a copy of this very first school picture.

The Adopted Toddler

2011-03-19T09:34:00.000-07:00

I think there is sort of an unspoken rule of thumb when it comes to adopting children. The younger the better. Wouldn’t it be great if every orphan was adopted in infancy? Great for the child and even better for the adopting family.

Why is that? For me it was the fear of adopting a child who had already picked up orphanage behaviors, a child who had already learned not to bond too closely to one person, a child whose early intervention window was closing fast. And besides, toddlers and prekindergarteners are just not as cute as babies... right?

Babies are easy to fall in love with. It is simple to forget that you did not birth this tiny bundle. The blank slate is still yours to decorate. Crying fits, loaded diapers, and throw up are just plain more acceptable when the perpetrator is a twelve pound mass of adorable.

But I have news for you... adopting a young child, a walking and talking child, has its own unique set of joys and amazements. Because, you see, there are “firsts” awaiting this child that bio children blow through at much younger stages, much less expressive stages.

Take the bathtub for example... Masha was afraid of water. I can only assume that bath time for her had been just another caretaker chore at the orphanage. Maybe she was made to stand up and sprayed or had water poured over her. Maybe she was held tight so she couldn’t escape a hair washing even when water got in her eyes. Whatever the case, bath time and play time were not synonymous. But they are now. Watching Masha conquer her fear and become enamored with the tub has been a delight for all of us. Even the boys are awestruck as she log rolls round and round, face under, face up, like a little seal.

Or take food... everyone of my children has hit the “Ewww, I won’t eat that” stage, which seems to be lasting years for some of them. But not Masha. It is a pleasure to watch her enjoy a freshly chopped tomato, or experience grapefruit for probably the first time in her life. She is so willing to eat good healthy food... while the others are complaining, she is digging in. I say, “Masha is it good?” and she says, “Uh huh.” She is the chef’s favorite child.

But my favorite “first” for Masha is her response to affection. In the beginning she allowed us to hold her, hug her, and kiss her. She would give a kiss if told to. She would come to us for “playful” affection... to be picked up and swung around. Over time, her understanding of human touch has expanded and blossomed. Now she seeks out hugs and kisses. Now she climbs into my lap and rests against me, calmly enjoying our closeness. Now she asks to be rocked to sleep at night.

Did she come with some orphanage behaviors? Oh yes she did. She can dress herself, put on her own shoes and coat, and undress herself as well. She craves routine. She cleans up after herself (Oh Lordy, do ya think Vorzel might want a few more orphans for a while?) She does not bite, scratch, or pull hair.

Is she perfect? No, of course not. But the point is that adopting a toddler has some sweet surprises that do not come along with an infant. Not sure you believe me? Go get one of your own and you’ll see, lol!

Sharing Some Love

2011-03-10T18:27:00.000-08:00

Recently I wrote a post for TheHighCalling.org as part of their orphan care series. It is titled, 5 Unexpected Ways You Can Help Orphans. Below is an excerpt...

We all know they're out there, far across the oceans, or maybe even in our own backyards... Babies, toddlers, teenagers who for whatever reason are alone in this world. Orphans, with no one connected to them by blood, or law, they move through their lives at the mercy of those presently in charge of them. Next month, next year, or tomorrow, the crib they occupy could be given to another as they are moved to a different environment. Imagine a childhood made up of such instability, where nothing and no one belongs to you.

I could never find a comfortable place in my mind for these “waiting children” (as they are referred to by adoption agencies), and thus, I neglected to act on their behalf. I forgot about them in my daily life. After all, it was too depressing to contemplate hundreds of thousands of innocent, unwanted children.

Then one day, I stumbled onto a website that had pictures of children available for adoption. I saw a little girl with Down syndrome and pony tails. She was holding a doll. Her expression was hauntingly empty. She suddenly became so real to me that I hurt for her. I wanted her to have a family, but what could I really do about it?

Read on...

Little Girls Update

2011-03-09T11:07:00.000-08:00

I wish I could find the time to blog about everything Masha and Autumn are doing and experiencing, but really, this is an intense time for me... trying to take care of all my little ones, work, and keep my house up... and oh yes, be a wife. So I’ll just share some slices of our life with you.

Autumn:
She is sitting up on her own and holding her bottle by herself, two big milestones. Her medicine seems to be helping and she is gaining weight. When she came home she was in 3 month clothes and now she is just moving into 9 month outfits. She enjoys peek-a-boo and will make the b sound when it is time to say “boo”. She claps, and throws her arms up when you say “hooray” to her. And when Autumn laughs, you have to laugh with her because she sounds like a squeaky toy.

And if you have forgotten how beautiful Miss Autumn’s eyes are, here is a little reminder...

Masha:
She loves school, no doubt about it. She participates in everything and has even started pool therapy there. Her ability to understand English amazes us. Masha can say and sign so many words... she has no trouble making herself understood.

Masha sings and dances, her favorite song is ring-around-the-rosie but she only sings the “ashes ashes” part and then says “po” which is Ukrainian or Russian for something falling down. (Every time something falls Masha announces “po”). I think it is cute how she translated the song into something she is able to say. When I say Masha dances, I mean she loves music and dances to it instantly when it comes on. She is so funny... the girl has moves. It is even funnier when she takes whatever toy she is holding and turns it into a microphone and starts singing along while she dances.

Masha is a helper. She clears the table after dinner... not just her own plate but anything she can find ends up in the sink. She retrieves the baby’s bottle and Kimani’s bottles and gives them back to the girls. She brushes my hair and tries to brush Kimani’s hair. Masha will scream and cry if anyone makes a mess around her, as in when Kimani dumps over a laundry basket or throws her plate. Without my asking Masha brings me a diaper when Kimani is sitting on the potty, and she gets the right kind (all three girls have different diapers).

Masha is a cross-dresser... either that or she is a super hero. She always takes the boys undies and puts them on over her pants. This child is so entertaining.

Masha does her own hair... and then plays a little music for us.

As I said, there is so much more... everyday I wish I could write about adoption, what I see and how I feel (the good and the bad), but for now, for this season, pictures and tidbits will have to do.

Will He Ever Feel What She Felt?

2011-02-01T21:16:00.000-08:00

For nearly three years, Peter has been waiting. Waiting all day, waiting all night... He waits for expert medical care, he waits for attention, he waits for someone to come and take him out of his crib, he waits for someone to play with him, to teach him, to guide his development. But above all, he waits for this...

(Peach and her new daddy in the Vorzel Baby House #2 visiting room)

Will Peter ever know the security of a father’s arms wrapped around him? Will he ever feel the rhythmic peace of his daddy’s heartbeat thudding in his ear? If Patti over at A Perfect Lily has her way he will. She is hosting a pure love giveaway to raise awareness about Peter so that his forever family will find him and have a full adoption grant to cover the cost of saving his life.

Donate even just $10 between now and Feb. 10 and you will be a part of changing this child’s future... you will also be entered into a drawing to win an iPad, a Nikon D90 digital camera, or one of lots of other awesome prizes.

Pictures Galore

2011-01-28T20:37:00.000-08:00

I think it is safe to say that Masha is no longer afraid of the tub.

Santa is one lucky dude.

Masha making waffles...

Who knew reflux could be this cute?

The purple snow queen... hates snow.

She would much rather stay inside and paint.

And party...

Static fun in Masha’s new tent...

Yeah, baby, now that’s a stocking!

My Christmas doll...

It’s just what I always wanted...

Double trouble in Kimani’s crib

It doesn’t matter how many times I tell her “ma-linky” (which is what those Ukrainian sales ladies said to me everytime I picked up a cute shirt or a pair of skinny jeans.)

My cutie-pie...

Masha feeding her baby doll...

Decorating the Christmas tree...

Forget it sweetie, you will never fit in Autumn’s onesies.

Nothing beats laughter...

Dear Ukrainian Lawmakers,

2010-12-10T06:27:00.000-08:00

Two of your Ukrainian babies are my daughters now. I know you want what is best for them because I spent 7 weeks in your beautiful country and visited the orphanage in Vorzel numerous times.

My girls were so well cared for... dressed in clean appropriate clothing, in clean diapers and they had clean hands and faces. Their baby houses were clean and their caretakers were working hard. My girls were loved by their doctors, their caretakers, and the facilitator and translator we used to complete our adoption. One of my girls was even lucky enough to have paternal grandparents who visited her regularly and showered her with the love of family. These girls had the best your orphan system has to offer.

But you know, as I know, that they were living this life on borrowed time. Eventually (and not too far off for my older girl) the day of transfer would come. A simple birthday would change everything they had ever known and life in a mental institution would ensue.

In their cases, before that fateful day arrived, you allowed them the privilege of a forever family in the United States. I do believe that it was brave of you to let them go far across the ocean to a world you know only through negative press. I promise you it was the right thing to do for them.

Now they have everything they had before and more. The children they play with everyday will always be with them, even as adults. Their caretakers are now a mama and papa who will always care for them. Their bedrooms, their toys, their books and clothes will always be theirs even after they turn four years old. They now have the security of a family, and family is for always.

So on December 16th as you consider voting to close down the international adoption program, think about the one thing your system cannot provide, the one thing that money and laws cannot grant an orphaned child, the greatest gift that adoption gives to a child... ALWAYS. Please don’t vote to close the door on the blessing of forever families for your orphans.

Thank you,
Masha and Autumn’s mama & papa

Birthday Baby News

2010-12-05T17:44:00.000-08:00

Autumn is one. This is still pretty unbelievable to me. She is just so tiny.

For her birthday celebration she enjoyed an ice cream cake and a shiny pink balloon. I think it is safe to say that Autumn has never before tasted ice cream or felt the icy sweet coldness of it on her tongue. She was very motivated to feed it to herself. And yes, when all was said and done, she puked it up.

She has started reflux medication but it is only helping a little bit. I am not so sure reflux is the real problem. Autumn has very low muscle tone and the esophagus is a muscle. Every time she burps, or stuffs her thumb in her mouth, the contents of her stomach bubble up because her muscles are not working to keep the door shut. The fact that Autumn is an avid thumb-sucker exacerbates the situation. I have taken to keeping her left arm out of its sleeve, tucked against her, with the empty sleeve wrapped behind her... straight-jacket fashion. But she refuses to fall asleep like this, so at nap and bedtime I give in and let her have it back.

Autumn’s early intervention evaluation indicated that she would benefit from physical therapy, speech therapy, and special education. Last Thursday was her first session, PT. She loved it. She is a tummy time baby. (I am guessing that the Ukrainians don’t subscribe to the “back-to-sleep” paranoia like we do because Autumn is a hard core belly sleeper.) Autumn showed us that she can stretch far to retrieve a toy, that her lower abs work beautifully so long as you hold her hips and thighs firmly, and that sitting up is not so far off. I am really proud of how hard she works and how little protesting she does during it.

My baby girl knows I am her mama now. She will track me with her eyes when other people are holding her and she will reach out to me if I come near. Her whole body does the love wiggle when I smile at her. And though she babbles “da da da” consistently, she can say “ma ma ma” which always makes me happy.

Autumn loves to eat. She will eat most anything and is getting better at taking a spoon as well as chewing. She doesn’t seem to have any texture aversions. She loves mashed bananas and whole fat French vanilla yogurt, pureed black bean soup, and mashed sweet potatoes. If I wipe her mouth or move her bowl out of her sight, she will cry. In fact, if anything at all makes her think the meal is over, she will cry.

And speaking of crying, she has the sweetest, saddest cry ever. Her facial expression freezes up and then her lips start to tighten into a line as her face turns pink. After a couple of silent seconds (warming up) a trill rolls out of her and the drops start to slide down her cheeks. Then it is just soft “waaas” until you give her whatever it is she wants. With a darling cry like that, it will be hard not to spoil her.

Thanksgiving

2010-11-29T08:44:00.000-08:00

I have so much to be thankful for on this first Thanksgiving with Masha and Autumn. When I sit and think about it, it is overwhelming. Last Thanksgiving, adoption was nothing more than a “someday” dream for us.

Thank you to all who prayed for us. Thank you to the 47 people who donated a total of $10,281, and to the 48th donor who matched that total. Thank you to those who donated gifts, and those who blogged about us to get our story out. Thank you to Reece’s Rainbow and our stateside facilitators, our notaries, doctors, social worker, county and state officials, and to our in-country facilitator and amazing translator. Thank you God for tying it all together to bring us two beautiful daughters.

On Thanksgiving morning, Masha and the Gecko pulled the winning ticket from the vase that held the 127 entries for “Melissa at the Piano”.

Jackie Parambil is the lucky winner. I have already confessed to coveting this work of art, and so I created my own version... “Masha at the Piano”. (Notice we have another Giants’ fan in the making :-)

Here are a few other things I am thankful for...

Jade loves his Princess Peach

Ring Around the Rosie Girls

The First Turkey Dinner

Pie, Pie, & More Pie

Especially Blueberry Pie

My Gorgeous Sons

The Potty Opera

2010-11-08T18:44:00.000-08:00

After her bath, Masha makes a very entertaining attempt at going potty. If she doesn't crack you up, you're broken.

Slacker News

2010-11-08T13:40:00.000-08:00

I have been thinking about blog posts... and every night I fall into bed exhausted telling myself, “Maybe tomorrow.” Today, I told myself, “Ok, just write anything and post some pics so people know these kids are still alive and well.”

Halloween was extra fun this year with five little ones dressed up as a knight, a ghost knight, a bat, a hefflelump, and a bunny rabbit. Everybody cooperated, even Kimani who is notorious for pulling off any type of costume or hat. Masha figured out pretty quickly how the whole trick-or-treat thing works and then threw a fit each time I dragged her out of the neighborhood candy dishes.

Autumn went to the cardiologist and the news is fantastic. She had a great fix and has no residual damage from waiting so long for her surgery. Her heart is the right size and beats in perfect rhythm. Like her sister, she did not like the chest X-ray machine, but she was very well behaved for her electro-and echocardiograms. I loved watching her beautiful heart chambers pumping away on the screen.

Masha is really something. Everyone who meets her is charmed by her. Yesterday she fell and hurt her finger. She was holding her hand and came to show it to me. I asked her if it hurt and she lifted it to her mouth and kissed it, then she passed it up to me. It didn’t take her long to figure out the great American boo-boo cure.

Kimani and Masha have been teaming up for fun... baths, swinging, general household destruction...

p.s. Shhh, don’t anybody tell Masha’s groupas that I let her run around in just a diaper...

Oh Baby, Baby

2010-10-16T11:46:00.000-07:00

Autumn’s real gotcha day outfit...

Last spring when Andrea from Reece’s Rainbow emailed me about a six month old cardiac baby, nicknamed Peach, who needed a family ASAP, I was excited. It is almost impossible to adopt a child under the age of one from Eastern Europe and I felt blessed to have the opportunity.

As the adoption process moved slowly along, I struggled with the feelings of losing her... the real chance of it due to her heart and the fact that her babyhood was slipping by week by week. Our infant would be ten months old by the time we got to her.

But when they brought her to me for the first time, both sides of that fear melted away. She was so tiny, almost bald like all my other babies, and light as a kitten. But she was strong. She could hold herself up steady and grab onto fingers and toys. She could vocalize several consonant sounds, and would smile at will.

(In Kyiv, her bed was the stroller...)

She can roll over and push herself up on her forearms. She likes to sing and will take turns “talking” with me. She blows raspberries. She watches me and tries to get me to look at her when I am going by. If I do look at her, she cracks a huge smile and then cries if I don’t pick her up.

(because we found out soon enough that this floor bed couldn’t contain her.)

She is a thumb sucker and a belly sleeper. She loves hair and will chew on mine whenever she gets the chance. She is a good eater and so far has tried rice cereal, banana, pumpkin/banana, and prune baby food, and a few bites of a sryupless pancake. When we got her, she was a big puker but now she is keeping down her food quite well, thanks to all the great ideas my FB friends shared with me about smaller portions and thickening, and of course holding her up endlessly, lol.

Autumn had a cold and was hospitalized right before we picked her up. She has been to see the pediatrician who put her on antibiotics and eye drops. He listened to her heart and lungs and said she sounds good. In a couple weeks she will visit the cardiologist for a follow-up echocardiogram.

She is enjoying her role as the family baby, basking in adoration from her brother Jade who can’t keep his hands off her. Of course, Kimani is not impressed by her and thinks the tuft of hair on her head is a convenient handle. Masha, my mini-me, mothers her... she brings her toys, tries to clean her face, helps me change her diapers, and pats her along with me when I burp her. Gecko thinks she is cute and loves the fact that “she is so tiny.”

She is a beautiful baby. I look at her and wonder... isn’t it amazing that she is mine?

More Masha

2010-10-08T15:24:00.000-07:00

Ok, before I post more about Masha let me just say that yes, Autumn is doing fine. She is healthy and happy and has a post of her own coming up soon.

My first attempt at making Russian salad (for Masha)

Tasting the ingredients...

Testing the final product...

“I think it needs some salt, mom”

Can this be the same girl who stood trembling with fear when her feet first touched the water?

Masha loves how high and fast her new swing is...

My four year old Jade took pictures of us :-)

We were so blessed to meet Masha’s grandparents. They took us out to dinner at TGIF’s. They shared so much precious information about Masha, and all that went into the decisions that were made concerning her. It was clear to us that they love her very much and we have promised to stay in touch with them.

The Incredible Masha Grace

2010-10-06T09:01:00.000-07:00

This first week with Masha has been, what’s the word... impressive? eye-opening? heart-warming? Fascinating, actually.

Masha is a copycat. If you do it, she can do it. The first night we had her, she refused to let me brush her teeth... she clamped her jaws shut tight and made horrifically loud, throaty protests. The next morning I brushed my teeth in front of her and she indicated that she wanted my toothbrush, so I gave her hers. She proceeded to start brushing her tongue. I crouched down next to her and made a big show of brushing my teeth and she began to brush hers, side to side, up and down. Now she is a pro.

Masha can talk. She can say “kitty”, “water”, “give it to me”, “it fell”, “no no no”, “yes”, “poo/ garbage”, “mama”, and “its raining”. She probably says more than that but my Russian is pretty much non-existent, so I don’t know... you should hear her chat on the phone though, lol! On the first day she learned to sign “more” and “eat”.

Masha feeds herself with a spoon and can drink from an open cup. She sits at the table and has wonderful manners. When she is done, she hands me her plate and cup, and then wipes herself clean. If she drops something, she picks it up and calls out to me, “ka ka”. If she doesn’t like the taste of something, she gently pushes her bowl out of her reach.

Masha can dress and undress herself. If she sees me putting on my shoes or a coat, she runs and gets on her shoes and coat, and climbs into her stroller, or stands at the door. But when we were getting ready to go to the airport I told her we were going “paka paka, home” and two minutes later she was completely undressed. I redressed her and continued packing up. She undressed herself again. Then it hit me, she thought we were taking her back or leaving without her. I explained that mama, papa, and Masha were going home, going bye bye and then she stayed dressed.

Masha is gentle with Autumn and lets me know when Autumn is upset (as if I can’t hear her bawling her head off, lol) She pets Autumn, and “grooms” her, and brings her toys.

Masha likes to sing and dance. She likes to play with her tea set and will make me a cup and bring it to me. Masha loves books, especially when she is sitting on the potty. She loves to sweep, and will pick up any papers or crumbs off the floor and bring them to me for the garbage. She helps to load the dishwasher and puts her clothes in the hamper.

Masha’s gross motor skills are off the charts. She can climb into her stroller and out of the playpen. She can climb up into her car seat and down from her booster seat at the kitchen table. She can jump up off the ground with both feet together. She has strong arms and can hang from the door handles and pull her legs up off the floor. She has learned very quickly how to go up and down staircases with little support. She is tough enough to push her bigger 4 year old brother around when they both want the same thing.

Masha is affectionate. She runs to me with a huge smile, hugs me, and gives me kisses. She shares her toys and food with me. She comforts herself by putting her head in my lap or climbing up on me to put her head on my shoulder. She follows me around. She holds my hand.

Masha, Masha, Masha... I am so glad she’s mine.

Yeah Babies, We Got You

2010-09-29T13:24:00.000-07:00

Masha was first. But even before we could go get her, we had to stop by the director’s office and sign some papers. The building was dark and quiet... no lights or computers running... no electricity at all. It will be off until winter to save money. Times are tough in Vorzel.

Masha was napping. I had asked if I could go into her living room to take pictures for her scrapbook and I was told that I could. So while I was snapping pics, they woke her up and brought her in and put her on the changing table. I took her outfit from my bag and began dressing her.

No no wait... it is cold outside... Masha will catch cold. You must keep her warm. And with that they brought me tights, an undershirt, a long sleeved shirt, and a white button up sweater... to go with the undies, socks, shoes, dress, and wrap I had for her. I politely declined the shirt but layered on everything else. It was so much stuff that I could not get her dress zipped up!

She looked beautiful and all her nannies were ooohing and ahhing and telling her she is a princess. Masha was very cooperative while I dressed her. She can practically dress herself. Once she was all ready, she charmed everyone by twirling around and showing off. Then we told her to go show papa and she zoomed out to the sitting area to find daddy.

Everyone came to say goodbye to her... all the caretakers and the doctor. Masha was very excited but when it came time for the actual goodbye, she got scared and clung to her doctor. I gently pried her away and began walking her down the sidewalk toward the car. She did not like the seatbelt and did not want to be closed in the car. I was sad for her that she was so terrified but she calmed down once she snuggled on mommy and we started driving.

Next stop, baby house #2 to pick up a nurse from the orphanage who would accompany us to the hospital to help secure Autumn’s release. The orphanage lawyer had already stopped at baby house #2, to make sure that there would not be an issue on the orphanage side seeing how Autumn’s usual doctor was on vacation, so I thought things would go smoothly... I was wrong.

At the hospital we went to a nurse’s office and asked to get Autumn. Suddenly the orphanage nurse was having a back and forth with two nurses from the hospital. Our facilitator tried to negotiate a solution and our translator ran back to the car to get our court decree. I asked her what the problem was and she explained that the orphanage nurse wanted the hospital to write up some paperwork saying that they were releasing Autumn directly to us. The hospital was insisting on releasing her to the orphanage nurse who could then transfer her to me. (Hubby and Masha were waiting in the car.) It took about 30 minutes to get the orphanage nurse to go along with the hospital’s wishes, and she insisted on seeing Autumn to determine if she thought she should be released at all.

You would all be very proud of me for sitting there patiently waiting without yelling at anyone to just give me my baby because, hello, SHE IS MINE. I did ask our translator if we could get her dressed in her gotcha outfit while they wrapped up the skirmish. Nadya asked permission and learned that the orphanage nurse, who was in “checking out Autumn” was actually dressing her to go. Two minutes later she came back with Autumn stuffed into a winter snowsuit complete with the hood pulled up over a hat that was tied down tight. I almost burst out laughing. My poor hot baby.

The orphanage nurse, holding Autumn, was waiting for us just outside the office door. As we walked out she made no move to hand her to me. I was done waiting and being patient. I asked Nadya to tell the nurse to give Autumn to me. The woman did not flinch or change her expression or anything, so I walked over to her and smiled at her as I reached for Autumn and then extracted my child out of her grip. She hovered as if she was waiting for me to give her back, but I didn’t because I am never giving Autumn “back” to anybody.

There is more, lots more to tell, but that was gotcha and the rest will have to wait for another post because you know, babies only sleep just so long...

Noodled Out

2010-09-26T01:57:00.000-07:00

Yesterday morning I was sitting on the couch with my husband checking emails and whatnot when I was seized by a tremendous craving.

“I have a craving,” I announced to him.
“For what?” he dutifully inquired.
“For anything that tastes like it is supposed to.”

First I longed for a strawberry milkshake made from real hard strawberry ice cream, a double thick shake craving that immediately morphed into an urge for scrambled eggs and bacon, which then continued on to become an urge for good Mexican food washed down with a chocolate shake.

Don’t get me wrong, the food here is good... or rather the Ukrainian food here is good. We have found a cheap Ukrainian cafeteria where the two of us can fill up for under $15. The food is good quality but it is always a surprise. I go through the line and visually investigate pan after pan of casseroles, salads, fried meats... looking for ingredients that I love (or hate) and then point to the dishes I want. Once we get seated and start eating I find out what I really got... some days it’s good and some days it is... um, not what I expected.

Things that exist at home, like steak or caesar salads or pizza, just do not taste right here, so going out to restaurants is always (slight) hit or (big) miss. In the beginning it was kind of funny but now it is frustrating. Even chips (Pringles and Lays) and candy (Twix and Snickers) taste odd.

Quail eggs (and tomatoes) in my caesar salad...

Before we got here, I had a plan. I was going to grocery shop and cook for us. We would use the money we saved eating out to... well... eat out. But, all I have to cook on is a two-burner gas stove top and a microwave oven. The apartment came stocked with one large frying pan and one large pot. They can’t both fit on the stove top together. And anything recognizable in the grocery store is imported and costs ten times more than I want to spend, and of course it doesn’t taste like it is supposed to because it is imported from Europe not the US.

I have perused five or so grocery stores hoping to find something that will be easy to cook and that will taste ok. A few weeks ago we found the Ukrainian version of Ramen noodles, and they taste good, better than our Ramen noodles (though maybe not... it has been about twenty years since I ate Ramen noodles at home, so who knows.) And so now we eat Ramen noodles... a lot... practically every day (feels like college all over again... minus the Kraft macaroni and cheese).

Our Pantry...

I am noodled out. I know this because of the random cravings I am getting on and off all day everyday now. Then yesterday evening we Skyped with the kids at home. My sweet Gecko popped up in front of the computer holding a melt-in-your-mouth, perfectly browned slice of bacon. I was fixated. With a big grin, he took a bite, and I nearly passed out. I think I am past ready to come home. I am so ready that I might wander over to McDonald’s today and order a fish sandwich just on the off chance that it will taste like a real McD’s filet-o-fish.

In other news... there is no news on Autumn. We are not allowed to go visit her. Tomorrow we are supposed to go pick her up, either from the orphanage or from the hospital if she is still in there.

Modeling the hat we bought her in Romania...

Our visit with Masha yesterday was wonderful. She is such a delight, so playful and energetic. However, after about an hour of being there with her, she went into the room that leads to her living area and started closing the doors. We called out to her, “Paka, paka?” (bye bye?) and she poked her head out and waved goodbye to us. I walked her back to her rooms and she turned and waved at me again. I see this as a very good sign that she is becoming sure of us, knowing that we will be back for her. She has also started to become more affectionate with me, hugging me longer, running to me to avoid a caregiver...

One of my favorite families is arriving in Kyiv tonight. They are adopting Makayla. This means that there are about six families here in the city today. I am hoping we can all get together for dinner tonight or tomorrow... probably at TGIF’s, which doesn’t taste like TGIF’s but is very tolerant of big groups of Americans and has an English-speaking wait staff :-)

Almost "Gotcha"

2010-09-24T01:22:00.000-07:00

If you were to do the math, you would realize that our ten day waiting period ended on Saturday, September 18. This means we could have picked the girls up from the orphanage on Monday the 20th, but we didn’t.

Most families are chomping at the bit to take their children out, and we too were looking forward to it. But the doctors, facilitator, and even our translator asked us to please wait for Autumn’s sake. Autumn is only two months out from her major heart reconstruction and although she is doing very well, she has never really been exposed to germs...

When I hold this tiny baby, I can see what my Kimani might have been like if not for the meningitis that robbed her of so much of her vision. Autumn stares right into my eyes with all her fragility and innocence.

There are many times when I second guess and play “what if” about the decisions we made with Kimani when she was in the hospital. In so many ways the situation was similar. It was like she was stuck in prison and we ached to bring her home. Maybe if we had not been so impatient to bring her home, we would not have agreed to a feeding tube... the tube that eventually led to her contracting bacterial meningitis.

Anyway, just so you know, I don’t stop the game there and wallow in sorrow and guilt... I always play it out to the end... when two years ago today she underwent the double heart surgery that saved her life. Without the weeks of being sick, she would not have had those two surgeries in the same day, and who knows what the outcome would have been for her if her aorta had been cut apart two months earlier, and her heart operated on four months later.

I tell you this just so that you can understand why I would let Masha and Autumn spend an extra week in an orphanage, rather than in my arms in the heart of Kyiv. I was afraid that Autumn would get sick, really sick, life-changing sick.

Yesterday was gotcha day. We were so excited. We brought their beautiful dresses with us to the orphanage. Five minutes from Vorzel, our facilitator got a phone call... Autumn is in the hospital. We continued to the orphanage and after many conversations with the staff and the hospital, we found out that she has cold-like symptoms and a fever. She will not be released before Monday.

Part of me thinks that maybe they are just being overly cautious, but the other part thinks they don’t take babies from the orphanage to the hospital for a just a cold. We are trying to get permission to visit her. I feel like if I can see her I will be able to tell how serious it is.

Please pray for Autumn that this is something that she will beat in a couple days.

Smooching with daddy (video)

Erased

2010-09-23T09:06:00.000-07:00

When we went to court on September 8 in support of our petition to adopt Masha and Autumn we knew that the decision had already been made and that this was more of a formality than anything else. But of course we were nervous that we might say something stupid and then the judge could slam down her gravel and throw us out with no babies.

On one side of the room sat the judge at her desk, along with the prosecutor and two jury members. On the other side we sat side-by-side in a row of chairs lined up against the wall, us, our translator, a social worker and the orphanage director. This judge was not the usual judge in this region and she rarely does international adoptions. She actually read our very long petition out loud in the courtroom.

And then came the questions... between my husband and I, we answered ten or so questions posed by the judge, prosecutor, and women of the jury. “How did you find these children?” “Why do you want more children when you already have so many children?” “Where do the children sleep and will your adopted children have the same privileges as your biological children?” “Why did you choose children with Down syndrome?”

Some questions are cut and dried, and easy to answer, like how our house is set up. Other questions are more complicated, like why do you want more children or why did you choose to adopt from Ukraine... And still other questions just can’t be answered fully and honestly if one wishes to remain tactful, like why Down syndrome...

But we got through it and the judge made a short speech, making things official. One of the things she said was that the names of Masha and Autumn’s biological parents would be erased from their birth certificates and that our names would replace them.

Erased. Their flesh and blood, deleted... wiped away forever in the records. From this day on I will be listed as the birth mother of Masha and Autumn. The only remnants of their past are their birth dates, places, and Masha’s first name. The rest has been erased. Their personal histories have been rewritten.

That struck me very hard. Their own mothers... not dead but erased, as if they never existed at all. And I, feeling somewhat like an imposter or perhaps even a thief, have stepped in and assumed them.

One day I will not feel like this. I will look at those certificates and know they are true. Because one day, Masha and Autumn will understand what a Mama is, and they will love me... their mama... with all their hearts, and this will prove to me that you cannot erase what never was.

Five Fast Days

2010-09-20T22:16:00.000-07:00

Romania... a country I have always wanted to visit but never would have... because well... it just isn’t France or England or Italy. After all, what is there to see in Romania other than Count Dracula? Lots.

On Wednesday we landed in Bucharest and picked up a car at the airport. Then we bravely set out with a high-level road map provided by Avis. We missed our first turn and found ourselves well on our way to somewhere other than our destination of Targoviste. Lucky for us there are only a few roads in that area of Romania, so we could readjust a few towns up.

In Targoviste we visited a monastery, had a delicious pizza lunch, and then wandered around the original castle of the Vlads built in the late 1300’s. Vlad Dracul and his son Vlad Tepes (the impaler) used the castle during the mid 1400’s. The castle was abandoned in the late 1600’s and fell into ruin. The tower is still in tact but the rest of the castle is in the process of being restored.

From Targoviste we headed West to Cutea de Arges to visit the monastery it is known for... the drive should have taken about an hour... ha ha. I think we drove the worst roads in that country with not a town in sight, though there were plenty of sheep, cows, shrines, and potholes in the road. In some places the road was missing and we had to inch along wishing we had a big ole 4-wheel drive. One hour turned into about four and the sun started to set...

Finally we got to Cutea de Arges... in the dark... with no detailed map or translator... and no Romanian SIM card. Frustrated, we stopped at a grocery store hoping to find anyone who could speak some English. A very nice couple read the address of our bed and breakfast and told us to follow them, which we did, though not without wondering if we had entered into some bad horror movie... two naive Americans blindly following a couple of Romanians after dark...

We checked in at our b&b and went across the street for dinner, where we found fried brains and offal soup on the menu, and no I did not order them. I know you are thinking that after that hotdog in Vorzel, I would eat most anything but even I have limits. Dinner was ok and after a drink we were ready for bed.

The next morning our hostess, Ruxi, made us a delicious country breakfast of omelettes, bread with jam, fresh vegies, feta cheese, and tea. Um yum yum. We asked her for directions to our next stop and she advised us to take a less travelled road so that we would be able to visit the ruins of Vlad Tepes’ fortress, 1480 steps up the side of a mountain. From there she said we could continue up through the Carpathian mountains on “the most beautiful” road in Romania that is “only passable two or three months of the year.” I have to admit, after our drive to her place from Targoviste, we were very hesitant to take a mountain road that is only usable a couple months a year. But Ruxi’s father convinced us that it was safer than the road we had come in on, so we went for it.

Going up there...

1480 steps is a lot of steps just in case you were wondering about that. After about the first four hundred or so, I was thinking that the zoom lens on the video camera would have been sufficient for visiting this site... At about 950 steps up, I understood why it was called a fortress and was thinking that nobody in their right minds could ever storm it. At the top I was thankful to God that I was able to make it there and take in the spectacular views, and I was also thankful that I am not afraid of heights.

The view of where we parked our car

The fortress

My very own Vlad

Hubby and I sat up there for a while (catching our breath) and we noticed a bridge across the way, and far above that, a road that disappeared into the mountain. A truck drove out of it and I got that wriggly feeling in my stomach... and then it occurred to me that maybe, just maybe we would be driving up into that mountain.

Oh yeah, that bridge was nothing compared to the rest of the trip up into and over the mountains. Twisting, turning, climbing, twisting, climbing... higher and higher until we were in the clouds. That road is not for the faint of heart but it is one of the most amazing drives I have ever been on. When we finally landed back on Earth, we were still a ways from Bran and of course the sun was on its way down.

Halfway down the other side (the easy side)

With all this to go

Have you seen the movie Dracula? You know the scene where he is racing to get to the castle before the sun sets? That was us. Really, who wants to be stuck on some lonely road in Transylvania at dusk? We stayed at the Hotel Bran and had a direct view of the Bran castle off our balcony.

Just like the night before, we headed across the street for dinner. This time we found “Dracula’s Manhood” on the menu and I said to my husband, “No way are we eating here.” (Really I insisted we leave because the menu had nothing great on it and the salon was empty... a sure sign it is not the best restaurant in town.) A few places up the street we found a wonderful spot called Christi’s that served the most scrumptious peasant potatoes ever.

In the morning we visited the castle. It has a lot of history and it was old, not sumptuous and ornate like a modern palace, but very realistic of an ancient castle with a wolf-skin rug, a secret staircase, and turrets with cross walks in between. Out side the castle there are plenty of street vendors to keep the shop-happy tourists busy. One of the vendors was making and selling funnel cakes... a sort of rotisserie cake. The dough is wrapped around a metal tube and then spun over hot coals. It cooks very quickly and is then covered in melted sugar. I bought one... um yum yum some more.

From Bran we went to Brasov, a 775 year old city first founded by the Saxons. We stayed in the old city center where all the buildings are from the 15th century... though we did venture across to the modern part of the city for a wonderful Italian dinner at Trattoria Del Chianti. In Brasov we visited the Black church, a stunning structure that was built and rebuilt from the 14th century through the present. We also visited the Brasov museum of history... that took a while, lol.

From there we headed back to Bucharest via the town of Sinaia where the castle Peles is located. This is a modern castle, layered in richness and luxurious details. You could spend a whole afternoon wandering its halls in awe... though we stayed only about an hour because we wanted to get to Bucharest before dark.

By now we had purchased a more detailed map of Romania and were fairly confident we would be able to find our hotel that was somewhere in the middle of the capitol city. Nope... there are huge 6-lane traffic circles, streets change names across intersections, lots of one-way streets, and enough crazy drivers to make a New York cabbie nervous.

Finally we pulled over and I managed to get a person to tell me which of the numbers to dial on our cell phone (that by now had a Romanian SIM card in it) to actually get the hotel on the line rather than the annoying “you have dialed a wrong number” message that I kept getting no matter which combination of numbers I dialed. (Think country code, long distance code, area code, and phone number... where did one number set start and another end?)

My knight in shining armor (who drove 730K of crazy roads)

We were right around the block, so within minutes we were in the comfort of our lovely hotel that came equipped with Craftmatic beds, his and hers sundries, and an espresso maker. After dinner and drinks at Sangria’s (the best dinner I have had since leaving home in August) we crashed until it was time to eat brunch and drive back to the airport.

Before we went to Romania I wasn’t sure we should do it. After all, we are here in Kyiv on important business, but now I am so glad we did it. It made the waiting period fly by and being away from all of our children helped to ease the pain of missing my sweeties back home. Now we are knee deep in paperwork again and moving ahead to our next milestones.

Ennui

2010-09-14T02:10:00.000-07:00

We were told by those who have been down this road that it will begin to seem like groundhog day. And they were right. Every day we get up, get ready, and head off for the metro/bus that will take us on the hour and twenty minute ride out to Vorzel. We get about an hour with each of our girls and then we head back to the bus/metro. Back in Kyiv we are starving and exhausted.

We have lunch at the Ukrainian cafeteria, cheap and yummy, or we go straight home and eat Ramen noodles. My gourmet chef talents are stifled by having only a microwave and a two-burner gas stove top for cooking.

We load the day’s pictures and videos, Skype with our family back home, and try desperately not to fall asleep on the couch while we wait for evening to come. By 6 p.m. we are wandering around looking for something to distract us from missing our loved ones. We are usually in bed by 10 p.m. in order to get up early and do it all over again.

This will go on for another couple weeks... we have had to reschedule our return to Oct. 2.

No, no, no... we just cannot do it. Too much time on our hands to miss our babies. And so we have planned a detour to Romania for a few days. That’s right, we made a date with Dracula. Years ago I started writing a novel set in the Wallacia region and now we are going there. We will drive from Bucharest to Brasov and back, stopping to visit the castles of Vlad and Dracula on the way.

When we return to Kyiv, the waiting period will be over and we will start the next round of paperwork that is needed to get our girls out of this country and into our own.

We will be staying in guest houses and small inns while in Romania, so we likely will not have internet access . So don’t worry if we aren’t blogging for a few days... (it is doubtful we will have been bitten by a vampire.)

I will leave you with some pictures to hold you over for a few days.

Kissing her babydoll

Wearing Daddy’s sunglasses

Playing her new harmonica

Pretty Autumn wants her binky back

For my friend, RissaRoo... is this it?

For Sandie who dared me to eat this hotdog

For Gecko and Jade (Don’t worry boys, we survived.)

Announcing...

2010-09-09T07:22:00.000-07:00

Not Doing It

2010-09-07T08:40:00.000-07:00

I am a planner by nature... okay maybe not a planner, but more of a fantasizer. I daydream a good portion of my future actions, playing it out this way or that way, and our time at the orphanage was no exception.

I was dressing the girls in fancy outfits I brought from home. Changing their very wet diapers, feeding them yogurts and applesauce, fixing their hair, doing EI therapy with them... All the while my husband was dutifully photographing these adventures so that I could share it all with you on this blog.

But I’m not doing it. None of it. Partially because they come to us well- (and over-) dressed, with diapers that don’t stink, and hair that is impossibly soft and short... and it is always either lunchtime or dinner time right before or after we visit, and we dare not ruin a child’s well trained appetite. So it just doesn’t seem necessary.

But I know that it is more than that. These are last days, and for that reason they are special days. The women who watch over and care for our children know this. They present our girls to us with pride... in clean clothes and with clean faces. They tell our children encouraging words, though we can only pick out a cheerful “mama” and “papa”. Then they wait just that extra second to enjoy (and maybe evaluate) our reactions before shuffling off to do more work in another room.

I realized that out of respect and thankfulness I cannot redress these children, change their diapers or shoes, fix their hair a different way, or feed them anything other than a little drink of water or a bite of apple from a tree on the grounds. This “doing nothing” is one of the only ways I know of to show my appreciation for all that they have done for my children while they were motherless.

And besides, if I was changing things up, you would be missing out on some very hilarious fashion-statements... which will be fun for me to look back on when perusing the scrapbook pages I am dreaming up for them. Really, would you rather see Peach in some adorable little Carter’s outfit, or dressed up as...

Peach the Blue-Headed Polar Bear

Just Pictures Today

2010-09-05T12:39:00.000-07:00

I know I have been slacking on eye candy, so here you go...

A Masha smile...

A Peach smile (or rather toothless grin)

Loved this hat so much I bought one for each of my girls

Peach and Auntie Belinda

Soon Masha, soon...

The Week in Review

2010-09-03T12:55:00.000-07:00

Monday - you can read about that in my last post.

Tuesday - We went to see the girls in the morning. Masha has decided that a daddy is a very cool toy that can toss her high up in the air. Now she seeks him out... for entertainment purposes only but hey it is a start, a great start. Peach, dear sweet Peach threw up all down mama’s back and leg. Then she sat on daddy’s lap looking all innocent while I cleaned it up. Later in the day we met “Jeannie” at the SDA offices and picked up the referral paperwork for Masha. The issue with her incorrect adoption paperwork has been resolved.

Wednesday - We had our sit down visits with the doctors. I’ll start with Masha because we went to her baby house first. Masha comes from a good family. She weighed 7 lbs 2 oz at birth. When she was two months old, she came to groupa house 5 and has been there ever since. She is dearly loved by her paternal grandmother who has visited her every week. The first year of Masha’s life she was given a course of amino acids and vitamins on a complex schedule to boost her cognitive and physical development. Her grandparents paid more than two thousand dollars for this special treatment and the doctors say that Masha has truly benefitted from it.

Masha is in good health. Her ASD has closed up on its own and she has no other physical ailments. Except it seems she is “allergic” to crying... and we were told not to let her cry. Lol, can you say spoiled? No, seriously, when she cries hard for a long time she gets laryngitis, so every effort is made to keep this from happening.

It is obvious that Masha is loved by the staff, particularly by the doctor there. She has been so well cared for. Her grandparents have always wanted to take her home but have been unable to get permission from her mother to do so. We are looking forward to meeting them.

Peach... Well first off, we were mistaken about Peach having grandparents... I mean I am sure she does but no one has ever visited Peach. Her doctor told us that she is Peach’s family and when we showed her the book we made, she asked to keep it. Peach’s doctor is a very strong woman, pretty and strict, and she runs a tight ship. It was so clear that she loves Peach very much. She has made sure that Peach has received everything possible to help with her development, including Omega 3 oil, vitamins, physical therapy and massages.

Peach weighed 7 lbs 7 oz at birth and scored an 8.8 on her apgar. At two months old she was transferred from the maternity house to baby house #2 and has lived there ever since. At three days old, Peach was diagnosed with a complete AV Canal heart defect. On July 16, 2010, she had OHS at the best children’s hospital in Ukraine. Her cardiologist says her fix was great and that she has recovered very well. She weighs just under 11 lbs and has been declared healthy by every specialist that has examined her.

Thursday - we went with “Jeannie” to the notary’s office to wrap up our paperwork needed for court. After that we took the metro to Babi Yar and walked all through the memorial grounds. It was a powerful experience for me and I will likely post about it at some point on my other blog.

Friday - We had sooo much fun with Masha this morning. We brought her a monkey that rolls over and laughs when its sensor is tripped. At first Masha was a little afraid of it but her caregivers encouraged her to play with it and she was talking to it and chasing it around. When we got to Peach’s house we had to wait a few minutes for her to finish up eating. We could hear her coming, crying very loudly... She came in all red faced with tears still on her cheeks. I took her and she started to cry again. I patted her and got a big burp, and then she calmed right down and snuggled in. It was wonderful to be able to comfort her.

Oh, mama, I’m sorry I puked on you...

2nd SDA Appointment

2010-08-30T08:41:00.000-07:00

We decided to go to the orphanage for the afternoon visitation today. So at about 1 p.m.ish I hopped in the shower and by 2 we were ready to head to the metro. But just as we were looking around for our apartment keys, the phone rang.

It was Nadya... whose name should really be Jeannie, because she looks like her and she can make anything happen that you need. Lost? Call Jeannie. Can’t read the menu? Call Jeannie. Can’t make the taxi driver understand the word Istanbul? Call Jeannie. Can’t remember where you are supposed to be on Monday at 3:00 pm? Jeannie will call you.

Yes, today was our second SDA appointment. Nothing exciting to report since this was just a formality. Though the SDA officer did ask if we had any more recent photos of Masha she could see and I was happy to show her Masha’s grandma book. Tomorrow at 4 our paperwork for Masha will be ready to pick up, and the next step is to set up court.

Today’s treat...

Updates and Pics

2010-08-28T12:25:00.000-07:00

I thought I should post an update about our actual progress here (or rather lack there of).

As you know our SDA appointment was August 19. For those of you not versed in Ukrainian adoptions, that was the formal “referral” appointment where they “show” us the child they are offering us and we agree to go meet them. They draw up papers and the next day they are available for the facilitator to give to the orphanage where the child resides. This is basically legal permission to go visit the child.

At our SDA appointment we learned that we need two appointments because the girls are not sibs. The second appt has not happened yet, nor is it scheduled as far as I know. Also we learned that Masha’s (Mallory’s) paperwork was not correctly done and her mother would need to get some things redone. We have not heard anything about how that is going.

We were able to meet both of the girls and, aside from the day the inspectors were at the orphanage, we can visit them whenever we want (during visiting hours). We are supposed to have a formal sit down with the doctor in each of our girls’ groupa houses. So far neither date has happened. We have tried twice with each but for various reasons it didn’t work out. We will try again on Wednesday the 1st.

Interpol, Interpol, Interpol, please hurry up. Right now Interpol is the hold up. Part of an international adoption requires being cleared by Interpol (yeah, that cool European version of the FBI that you always see in the movies). We cannot go to court without Interpol clearance. We were told that since ours is not ready, court will be set for September 8 in the hopes that it will be here by then. I am hoping for some miracle where it appears on Monday and they squeeze us in this Wed or Thurs.

Ok, so the judge agreed to waive the ten days. Wooo hooo, right? Well the next agency in line will not agree to honor her decision and will wait the ten days out before they will begin their part. OMG, seriously!?! That puts us at the 18th, which is a Saturday, so really we are looking at Monday the 20th to apply for the tax code. The tax code, yup, whatever it is, it takes about 5 days to get... and you need it in order to get the passports.

Monday the 27th we will be able to go for passports and whatever else is left to wrap up. That takes a couple days... Then beautiful Nadya smiles at us and says that this is of course the worst case scenario she has described to us.

Eye on the prize, eyes on the prizes...

Peach’s foot is the size of a newborn’s

Masha was very happy to see mama

She loved the little mirror compact we brought for her

Wish I felt this way about my reflection!

Let’s play telephone...

Missing My Babies

2010-08-24T07:01:00.000-07:00

We’ve been here a little over a week now and this is the longest I have ever been away from my children. Skype just doesn’t cut it. Jade kissed the screen yesterday and told us he wants to hug us. Cue the tears.

I can’t write about them. I want to tell you how they are but I can’t because I choke up when I think about them too much.

How to get around the ache? This is a city of distractions. We have walked so much of it, visited many places and eaten a whole lot of everything. I will share a bit of our therapeutic adventures...

On Saturday we headed off for the churches starting with Saint Sophia’s, the oldest standing church in Kyiv built in the year 1037. We climbed the bell tower and oohed and ahhhed at the views of the city as seen from up there.

There are bells hanging up in there that clearly are no longer used since they have swatches of scarves, and any other handy material, tied to them. I assume people tie these things there for good luck or in prayer. (Did anyone take the guided tour? Did they explain the meaning of the scarves?)

On the grounds of St. Sophia’s there is a carillon. As we approached it there was a family there whose children were testing out the bells. I joined in. They make such a lovely sound. My husband told us he could play a song on them (talented man I have!) and so he warmed up with an attempt at the Star Spangled Banner but quickly switched to Mary Had a Little Lamb. This prompted a screaming fit from a little babushka who was sitting on a nearby bench. Whew, she reamed him out. Moments later a security guard arrived to also give us a talking to (in Ukrainian). Then I noticed the sign... in English... Do Not Touch the Carillon. Ooops. I’ll bet I have the only man in the world who has played a children’s tune on the bells of St. Sophia’s, lol.

From there we headed off to Saint Andrei’s (the church outside the SDA office). It is beautiful inside and we were there for part of a service. My husband and I lit candles and said prayers and it was really moving. Once again though, he found himself in trouble... no video allowed inside the church. I should have prayed that my husband doesn’t end up arrested anytime soon.

Next was Saint Mikhayil’s Cathedral built in 2001. It is stunning. I’ll say it again, stunning.

It is probably the most beautiful church I have ever been in. We saw part of service there too, and I was moved to tears. The entire back wall is made up of ornate goldish metal surrounding saints pictures. There are decorative hanging votives, alters for hundreds of skinny yellow candles, and a lovely wrought iron cupola with a spiral staircase that descends beneath it. No pics allowed. For the most part we behaved and I have only pics taken through the open doorways...

By then we were all starving and we set off in search of true Ukrainian fare. We found a place and bravely headed in. The menu had no descriptions in English and the waitress spoke no English, so we took our chances and ordered a bunch of different things including borsch, varennikis, salads, mushroom soup, veal in a jug, chicken in nut sauce, strudel, and some prune thingie (ack...and I have a picture to prove it but you won’t see that until I post about the odd side of Kiev). Belinda lucked out with the chicken dish, so delicious. The rest of the meal was so-so. It is hard to know if that is how Ukrainian food should taste or if the chef was not the best. (To solve this mystery, we have to continue our eating adventures...)

Catch up notes: In answer to questions received in comments and also follow-ups to other things I told you in previous posts...

1. $17 per 1/2 gallon ice cream isn’t so tasty... probably because no one can afford it and it has been sitting in its packaging since St. Sophia’s was built.

2. There is a 20% tax on everything here, so that was a huge part of our initial shocking grocery bill.

3. We did pick out our apartment and in my Busy Bee post I link to it if you want to see it. Um, it is missing two of its couches and the bean bag chair... wherever will I stick a baby?

4. We have 3 bio kids living at home... Gecko 7 yrs old, Jade turning 4, and Kimani who is two and has Down syndrome. Hubby has other children who are too old to live at home but are just as beautiful and fun as those back at the farm.

5. TGIF’s is overpriced but still has the best mudslides in town :-)

6. Our facilitator and our translator are both awesome. We are lucky to have them, especially our lovely translator who is funny, attentive, and who tells us which is the best beer and cough syrup in town. (Yes, those dang raspberries gave me a cold.)

Picture credit... all the really great pictures were taken by Belinda.

Beautiful Girls

2010-08-23T10:17:00.000-07:00

For months there was just a picture, or two. A split second frozen digitally... that is all we knew of two little girls who waited across the world for us to come for them. I wondered what would they feel like, what would they smell like, what would their voices sound like, their coos, their cries...

Today I found out.

We went to Peach’s house first. When they brought her into the room and I saw her, the tears came. The nurse gave her to me and it felt just like when they place your newborn in your arms. She is tiny but very solid and strong. She held her head up and looked me in the eye with such focus. She is so amazing. I feel privileged that someone would give her to me to keep.

Within minutes she proved to be a daddy’s girl. It was true love as soon as she discovered her papa’s beard. She kept reaching for it, digging into it. Even when he handed her back to me, she looked for him and reached out toward him.
Then she was whisked away and we were escorted out the door. A very short drive later we arrived at the gate of baby house 5.

After a moment of waiting, a troop of children shepherded by ladies on each side came around the side of the building. The leader, a little guy with blondish hair lit up when he saw us. He ran to me and jumped up into my arms... Awww. I gave him hugs and kisses and then put him back on the step. A second later it was Masha’s turn. She gave me a great big smile and let me lift her up. She was laughing and enjoying the attention... until I tried to give her to daddy. At that point she grabbed on to me and refused to be given away or put down.

She tired of me fairly quickly and indicated that she wanted to get down. When I let her go, she ran over the to swingset for a few minutes of swinging. From there she hopped on a stroller tricycle and rode it down the sidewalk to the gate. At the gate she got off the toy and banged on the gate. She said something to me and then said “Vroom vroom”. I told her that yes, soon I would take her away in the car and bring her home.

The lunch cart came and we were told that Masha would follow it because she likes to be first in line. She went to it, peeked under the blanket at the jugs and pots, and then ran back to me. The groupas told her it was lunchtime and called her in but she climbed into a stroller instead. She started strapping herself in so they told us we could take her for a ride in it around the grounds. Next she let herself into the play area and took out a baby doll stroller which she proceeded to push down the walkway. I put her new doll in it and she promptly tossed her out into the grass, lol.

When it was time to leave, there were no goodbyes. A nanny came and swooped Masha up off the sidewalk and took her inside. She started to scream and cry and I could not look back.

There is so much more to tell but I know that it will take me some time to process it all and do it justice. So for now I will leave you with more Peach pictures...

The Eagle Has Landed

2010-08-19T14:31:00.000-07:00

We began our journey grounded in our home city airport because all air traffic into JFK was halted. This meant that before we even took off, we knew our connection to Amsterdam was blown. The very nice lady at the Delta counter told me that she was putting us on the 9:45 p.m. flight from JFK to Paris on Air France. Ok, that is my favorite airline and flight across the Atlantic ocean. They feed you very yummy food, lots of desserts, and then you drift off to sleep to the sound of pilots and stewardesses speaking the prettiest language in the world.

But what is a trip to France without a dog? As we settled in on the night flight, a tall dark woman began loudly exclaiming in French that she hates dogs (she must be some version of fake French) and will not sit next to the woman who has her neighbor seat. Believe it or not, the lady with the Pug was American and had no idea what Ms. Mad was saying. Three airline personnel were trying to soothe the situation to no avail. I spotted my chance to snag a window seat and my husband said he did not mind at all being stuck next to Ms. Mad because he doesn’t understand french either. So I switched places... I got the window, dog lady took the aisle, and Ms. Mad spent the flight snuggled up to my husband a few rows back. The Pug was a service dog and behaved herself the whole flight.

An hour after landing in France we were on our way to Kiev, in business class thanks to the Delta representative in JFK who took a fancy to my hubby. This meant extra chocolates and cookies. When we landed in Kiev we hopped into a metro type bus that was about 150 degrees inside and rode over to the airport building. It took about ten minutes in line to get our passports stamped and move to baggage where we waited hopefully for quite some time. Once the belt stopped, we quickly headed to Lost Baggage. The line was already forming... and it takes a while to fill out all the papers. Suddenly Ms. Fake Blond #312 butts ahead of everyone and steps right up to the counter. Her audacity was stunning and the guy in front of me who had been next in line seemed just about as pissed as I was but no one said anything.

We finally completed our missing baggage paperwork and were shipped off to customs, the red line for those who have things to declare. I had been told by other Americans to just do the green line and keep walking, but with bags to follow after and without me, I thought it best to be prudent and declare the 19k we were carrying as well as the gifts that were in our missing bags. It took all of five minutes and cost us nothing. Oleg and Nadya were waiting for us outside and took us right to our apartment. Then they brought us to TGIF’s and dropped us on another family with instructions to them to show us “everything”.

They were tired and had already eaten but were gracious enough to sit with us while we ate dinner and afterward to walk us to a money changing place where we could also buy some foodstuffs. Then we were alone, off to our apartment to settle in.

(I hope I am not boring you to death, this being the longest blog post I have ever written...)

Our apartment is spacious and clean, and really quite nice. There were a couple of little things we needed to mention and ask for, but all in all, it is great here. We face the back of the building so it is quiet and the views into the windows below can be rather interesting... No description here because this is a family blog and what we saw most people have to pay to see, lol.

We slept until 2 p.m. the next day, which is 7 a.m. at home so I didn’t feel too bad about this excess. Once up, we were off to do some real grocery shopping. On the way to Mandarin Plaza we came upon some little old ladies selling raspberries in plastic cups. I wanted to buy some but my husband talked me into waiting. Then he went on to try to convince me that eating fruit that came from who-knows-where would make me sick. At the grocery store we bought some basics and it came to a whopping 1254 UAH. That is about $150. Oops. On the way home I inspected the receipt to try to figure out what the two items that totalled about $50 together were... and I really had no idea.

The raspberry ladies were still outside our apartment so I bought a cupful, and then gave 2 UAH to the disabled old lady sitting near them who was begging. She gave me a gold toothed grin in return and what I hope was a blessing in Ukrainian. The raspberries were delicious and so far I have not suffered any negative consequences from eating them.

During our second trip to the grocery store for more milk and water, I figured out that the cheese grater I bought and the chocolate ice cream my husband chose were the culprits. We will be avoiding the $17 per gallon ice cream from now on and thankfully my lovely $33 cheese grater will last a lifetime.

On the evening of the 18th, our bags arrived safely to our apartment. Everything made it just fine except for a tiny bottle of perfume that someone in TSA must have stolen. They left its wrapper. Weird. I unpacked and now it really feels comfortable here, especially since I brought my home-made latte supplies and made us each a yummy drink while we fussed with the Internet connections, Skype, phones, etc.

Today at 2 p.m. was our appointment with the SDA (State Department of Adoptions) and Nadya offered to meet us early around 1 p.m. to take us around a bit. We left the apartment much earlier to set off in search of men’s white cotton socks because somebody, ah hem, forgot to put his socks in the “To Pack” pile. We are in the heart of Kiev and in many ways it reminds me of NYC. Billboards with beautiful, glitzy models everywhere... expensive shops non-stop... Tiffany, Polo, Ferrari (goodies, not the actual cars for sale), Chanel, etc. There is no Walmart here folks, and no equivalent that we found. We walked many streets poking our heads into many doors and many times I lifted my husband’s pantleg and pointed to his sock... No socks... well we found $25 dress socks but no cheapo ordinary guy socks. We gave up and headed to TGIF’s to meet Nadya.

On the way, we saw a very long cream colored stretch limo, with balloons tied to it and a man holding the biggest, by far, bouquet of roses we have ever seen. Wow hubbies, these Ukrainian guys just raised the bar on you, big time.

Nadya walked us down a very busy famous street, Kreshchatyk which goes past several touristy type sites and a huge underground mall (socks maybe?). Beyond that we started up a long hill and went into a park with more up and down winding around with great views of the other side of the city. Then more brick stairs in the side of the steepest hill... up up up. Nadya asked me if I was tired. Yes, not exactly dead yet, but a bit sweaty and out of breath. She laughed and said that she thought it was ok to take us this way because I look skinny and in shape, ha ha ha. Luckily at the very top there is a stand that sells ice water.

Outside of the SDA there are many street vendors who are selling mainly matryoshkas. Nadya introduced us to her friend that she says will give us a good deal and I plan to go back when we have time to browse. We did see one of Obama with guess who inside? Clinton and every other democrat down to Kennedy. I cracked up. No Bush and company though. The church outside the SDA is beautiful and we will go back tomorrow to explore it.

(Need a potty break yet? Go ahead, I’ll still be here when you get back.)

Finally, the appointment... the formal referral of our girls. A guard lets us in and we are called upstairs by a pretty, dark haired woman. (Lots of pretty girls here, very dressed up, sexy high heels... poor hubby has whiplash already.) We sit down and the woman begins talking to Nadya in a tone that says something is wrong. I recognize only Peach’s last name. Nadya tries to talk her into or out of something but no dice.

Two children who are not siblings require two separate SDA appointments and Oleg will have to file more papers on our behalf for Mallory on Wednesday. Because Tuesday the 24th is the biggest holiday here and no one works Monday or Tuesday at SDA. The woman drops a stack of papers on the table and on top I see...

My beautiful Peach. They tell me what I already know and a little bit more... that her mother was a single mother and there are no siblings. Our referral for her will be ready tomorrow afternoon which means we can visit her on Saturday, if the social workers have not taken the day off for the holiday, or then on Monday unless they have also taken that day, in which case it will be Wednesday. Pitocin anybody?

Then begins a conversation about Mallory and again I can tell something is wrong that Nadya cannot fix with just her sweetness. Another stack of papers in dropped in front of us. This time there are two sides...

A very sad, unhappy baby with gorgeous blue eyes...

who turns into the cutest thing ever!

Mallory’s mother had the notary who wrote up her papers say that she could only be adopted by foreign parents. Ok, we are, that works.... but no it doesn’t because that is illegal here and now they must track down mom and have new papers written up. Seriously? For the first time since we embarked on this journey to Kiev I begin to feel a bit nervous. What if they can’t find her? Grandma can do it for her... remember grandma? Thank goodness for grandma. There is also no new info about Mallory other than she also has no siblings.

After the appointment we part ways with Nadya who has copies to make of some pages of our dossier. We head back down toward home and snap some fun photos on the way... like of the dog hangout where I thought they were all dead at first but then one moved. They were ownerless, possibly homeless. There seem to be a lot of strays roaming around this city.

The gate I would love to have to my backyard...

Another shot of the church we will visit tomorrow...

On our travels home we stopped at the mall and after about 25 stores, we finally found some cheapo white cotton socks for men, 5 pairs for $7, yay! Once we got in the apartment, we were too tired to cook so we munched on fresh bread and cheese.

Tomorrow at 9:10 a.m. one of my best friends arrives in Kiev. She will stay with us for a week. I can’t wait to see her since she lives in Florida now and I only get to see her a couple times a year when she flies north. And, she is a photographer... so hopefully my picture quality will improve!

We are all caught up now, you and I. So for tonight, it’s “A bientot,” or something like that ;-)

Busy Bee

2010-08-15T08:47:00.000-07:00

Remember that list of todos that was in my head? Well, most of it is done! It has been a crazy couple of days...

The money snafu... take note, it takes 3-5 business days to move cash money from anywhere to anywhere, unless of course you can wire it, which RR can’t. Western Union, Paypal, you name it... 3 to 5 days. So for a little while it was a bit of a panic trying to figure out how to get my bank to give me 18k in pretty 100 dollar bills that I did not have sitting in our account. Thanks to my cousin and her husband who loaned us 10k in cash, it all worked out ok. But lesson learned, don’t expect to get your money in 3 days. And on top of that, the nice bank manager picked through every 100 dollar bill in the vault to get clean ones because it takes 5-10 business days to get brand new bills.

Plane tickets all set... home city to JFK to Amsterdam to Kiev. Leave at 1:00 on Monday the 16th, arrive at 4:50 Tuesday the 17th, with a seven hour time difference. Got a great price through RR’s friendly travel agent who got us the humanitarian rate on Delta.

Apartment rented. Wanna see it? Ignore the price, they gave us an AMAZING rate break because we are in Kiev the whole time and are renting it for 5 weeks. Read the apartment description, it is hilarious.

Power of attorney doc, medical proxies... all set. Boy does it ever help to have an attorney for a friend who is also your next-door neighbor!

Packing... just about done and it all fit :-) Thanks to my packing police friends who have already done this trip and clued me in to what is easily available over there.

Babysitters... MIL on her way to NY right now. My mom is also packing up and coming tomorrow.

Electronics... Skype, cameras, etc all set thanks to my techno hubby.

And, we were blessed yesterday by a visit from Sandie the missionary who was at our orphanage in June of this year. She brought pictures, video, maps, and lots of info and advice. She drove up from PA and we had a great time together. She brought her daughter Jillian who had a wonderful time with my boys.

I wish I had time to write to everyone of you who has emailed me, commented on the blogs, left kind words on FB... I am so encouraged by your love and support. You have kept my spirits up and my nerves in check.

Gotta run... there are still a bunch of things around the house to wrap up, and some little ones that need mama’s full attention today. I’ll be posting again as soon as I can.

OMG, PTL

2010-08-11T05:57:00.000-07:00

We have a travel date.

I have been checking everyday, three or four times a day until it gets too late over there to be writing emails... and nothing. It is like that last two weeks of pregnancy when you just can’t wait. Your skin itches, you can’t sleep, you are constantly thinking about the baby (or in this case babies).

I am not good at indefinite waiting... it makes me a slacker. I need a deadline to function in high gear... so that big long list of things we have been meaning to do for the past month is still just a list, not even a list on paper, just a list in my brain.

But this morning everything changed. High gear here we come!

August 19th we have a date with the SDA. That is not a typo. Next Thursday, next week we will be in Kiev starting the formal process of becoming Mallory and Peach’s parents.

Woo hoo... happy dance, happy dance.

Peach’s Grandma Book

2010-08-09T12:23:00.000-07:00

Peach’s Grandma Book is finished. Scrapbooking is such a good de-stress mechanism for me. Doing this book was enjoyable because it was a small well-defined project. I really hope this book (and Mallory’s) gives the grandparents a sense of peace and hope for their grandbabies.

Peach’s book is also an 8” by 8” scrapbook. The lavender album is Creative Memories and it was given to me by the March of Dimes people that hosted a scrap night every Tuesday evening when my daughter Kimani was living in the NICU. Most of the book is identical to Mallory’s so I will only post the pages that are unique. And of course, the smears are just me smudging out personal info so that I could post these pics on the Internet.

Renaissance

The top part has her real Russian name and birth date. The bottom section has her American name and her adopted on date (the actual date will be hand-written in once it happens.)

Our Girl

The words say, “Precious girl”

Waiting

It says, “Waiting for Peach”

Mallory

It has Mallory’s American name, date of birth, and also says “adopted with Peach”.

Promise Letter

The letter says that we will always love Peach, that she will have a good life with us, and that we will teach her about her grandparents and tell her they love her.

Anxiety Attack

2010-08-07T07:57:00.000-07:00

Last night I was sitting on the couch with my husband, watching a goofy movie he got from the library, when it hit me... I am getting two new children in my life. You already know this... I already know this. But last night it hit me and my stomach tied in knots.

I sat there and had a full blown anxiety attack. My nerves went wild, my brain started making unwanted announcements...

“You have to leave your kids for five weeks and you still are not sure who will care for them while you are gone.”

“You have to fly to JFK and then to the far side of Europe, crossing the wide Atlantic ocean on the way... yeah, that is about four hours of flying over the deep water, nothing but water, nowhere to make an emergency landing.”

“You have to hide $18,000 in new hundred dollar bills in your bra, but don’t forget to declare it or they might confiscate it.”

“Last time I checked you only could say 5 words in Russian... Remember how hard it was to be in France? Huh? And your French was pretty good. You are going to be confused non-stop and everybody is going to know you are a “tourist” and you will probably get robbed.”

“Your internet connection isn’t going to work right because of some firewall that you can’t figure out how to get around. You will not be able to Skype with your family back home.”

“You are going to meet two little girls who might not even like you. They might be afraid of you. They might cry when you try to hold them.”

“While you are away, school will start and your son will get in all sorts of trouble because he is stressed out. He will get kicked off the school bus and grandma will be freaking out.”

“While you are away, your baby girl will sign for you and she will not understand why you don’t come back.”

“Someone is going to hand you two human beings for you to keep, forever.”

“You have to drag them back across that great big ocean... hours and hours on planes and in airports. And, they don’t understand a word you are saying. You are probably going to feed them something new that doesn’t agree with them and they will have diarrhea the whole time. Everybody on the plane will hate you because you can’t get your kids to stop crying.”

“You are going to finally get home and the three kids you left there are all going to be very angry with you, and jealous, and you are going to be too exhausted to do anything about it.”

Shut up already! Everything you just said is worth it to save their lives. They are going to be sent to a horrible place, left all day and night in cribs, starving and soiled. With no stimulation, they will pull their hair out and bite themselves to feel. They will cry and no one will come to comfort them... eventually they will never cry again. Within a couple years they will be nothing but skin and bones and one day their lonely little bodies will simply quit.

So stop trying to scare me... everything is going to be fine, just fine. I can do this. The butterflies in my stomach settle down a bit... Yes, someone is going to hand me two tiny human beings to keep, and their lives are going to change forever.

If Only...

2010-08-03T21:50:00.000-07:00

Toward the beginning of this blog, I told you that we were actually going to adopt a baby from a different country in Eastern Europe. Her name was Arina. She disappeared from the database and from our grasp. I still have this picture of her framed and resting on my dresser to remind me of the first orphan baby who won my heart.

While we were working on getting her, another little girl in her same orphanage caught our eye, and we had hoped to be able to take her too. She is a beauty, and she is nearing her date to be sent to the institution for the rest of her life. Next Spring, when our precious Mallory is celebrating her 4th birthday with cake, and presents, and lots of people to shower her with love, Anastasiya will be heading off to a place worse than where we imprison our most heinous criminals.

Anastasiya as a baby...

Anastasiya is waiting for a mommy...

Is Anastasiya waiting for you?

Her pretty little face haunts me. If only, I think with sorrow... if only we could have saved her too.

If you have room in your home, and in your heart, please consider adopting Anastasiya.

Due Date Blues

2010-08-01T08:40:00.000-07:00

My pregnancies were easy... no morning sickness, no elevated sugar, no bed rest... Other than the discomfort each time of having a humongo belly filled with a dancing night owl, pregnancy was good to me. And the best part about it was that there was a guaranteed time line... a due date that most doctors won’t let you go very far past. My babies were all early birds by 12-16 days, sweet things!

Oh but adoption is so different... you start off in control of almost everything. You decide when you will “get pregnant”. You decide the sex of your child, its health status, its age, even what color eyes it has if you want to go that far...

Soon you realize one thing is completely out of your control: the time line... there is no due date. An adoption can go on and on and on and on... mountains of paperwork and appointments...then waiting to take a trip over, maybe two trips, sometimes three or four trips to a foreign land where you are desperately trying to figure out what it will take to get the judge to sign those papers...

In the beginning you believe you have some control over the timing. You scheme and plan and add up the weeks for this or that and you create a false due date in your mind. Mine was set for late July.

But then a notary makes a tiny mistake, a town official refuses to cooperate, a set of papers is apostilled together rather than individually, your translator gets sick, your facilitator’s workload gets backed up...

Before you know it, it is August 1 and nobody is offering you a c-section.

Patience, I tell myself... after all, as Sylvia Plath put it, “(I’ve) boarded the train there’s no getting off.” And I know that eventually it will pull into the station where my little darlings are waiting for me.

(To all my friends on this same train, take heart... before you know it we will be celebrating together at TGIF’s)

The Happy Dance

2010-07-30T05:50:00.000-07:00

Can you see me? I am hopping up and down, tapping, turning and twisting and shouting “Yay, Yay, thank you God!” I am doing the happy dance.

Our dossier was submitted yesterday, and the adoption registry officer told our facilitator that Peach is in the database. Our little baby is cleared for international adoption and ready to go.

And on top of all that, there is a chance my amazing sister-in-law will come from MI (or TX, wherever they are calling homebase now) and watch our kids while we are gone. I have to tell you, being away from my children for five weeks is scary to me. Knowing they are home with people who are great with them is a lot off my stress list.

So for those of you who haven’t done this already... it means we are now just waiting for our date to leave. I am so excited. Tap tap, wiggle hop wiggle, tap wiggle hop, happy happy happy dance.

The Grandma Book

2010-07-23T14:06:00.000-07:00

Mallory’s Grandma Book is done. It was a lot of fun to make and I am happy with the way it turned out, though the parts I translated may be a bit rough. Our facilitator translated certain things for me, so at least grandma and grandpa will have some idea what I am trying to say, lol.

This is an 8” by 8” scrapbook. The album is Creative Memories (donated by my favorite CM consultant) and the rest of it is a mish-mash of scrap products I had in my stash. All the smears you will see are just me smudging out personal info so that I could post these pics on the Internet.

Cover

And, no don’t ask me if that’s her real name... you know I am not allowed to answer that question.

Inside Cover

You’re going to have to wait to find out her middle name :-)

Renaissance

The top part has her real Russian name and birth date. The bottom section has her American name and her adopted on date (the actual date will be hand-written in once it happens.)

Where is Mallory

Chez Nous

Inside Basics

Mom and Dad

The writing is “Father & Mother” and our wedding date.

Gecko

The word is “Brother”.

Jade

It says “Brother.

Our Girl

The words say, “The girl we chose” (I hope ;-)

Waiting

It says, “Waiting for Mallory”

Mallorella

The Grands

On the picture it says, “Grandpa & Grandma” and the other writing is the date of the photos.

Kimani Page1

It says, “Sister”

Kimani Page2

Peach

It has Peach’s American name, date of birth, and also says “adopted with Mallory”.

Promise Letter

The letter says that we will always love Mallory, that she will have a good life with us, and that we will teach her about her grandparents and tell her they love her.

Contacts

Album Back Inside Cover

Peach's Surgery

2010-07-22T11:30:00.000-07:00

This morning I was told that Peach had her full heart reconstruction done last Friday. She is back in the orphanage today.

This surprising news comes not from the surgeon but from our facilitator who got it from the caretaker who was with Peach for the duration of her stay in the hospital.

It is hard to be someone’s mother yet not be their mother at the same time. I want to ask the doctor questions. I want to know exactly what was done. I want to see her echo results and know her blood O2 levels. I want to tell them not to lift her up from under her armpits.

I have no right. I have no access. I have no voice.

Could it be true that it is done? All done and she breezed through it? I pray that it is so.

The Price of Love

2010-07-17T07:39:00.000-07:00

More than one jaw has dropped at the answer to a question I am often asked, “How much is it to do this?” Drum roll please..... $31,803

The next question is inevitably, “Why does it cost so much?”

Here is my answer...

$2000. - Homestudy. The homestudy is completed by a licensed social worker who is employed by an accredited adoption agency.

$275. - Love offering and application fee to Reece’s Rainbow, the organization that finds and lists children with Ds for international adoption.

$696. - Paper... copies of birth and marriage certificates, 42 documents county stamped ($3 each) and apostilled ($10 each).

$397. - Mailing fees... the cost of sending the paper, 118 for the first batch, 118 for the second, and 161 for the rest of the dossier.

$140. - Doctor visit co-pays... everyone had to go to the dr to prove their health status, mom and dad had to go twice.

$140. - Fingerprinting fees for state background check.

$75. - The cost of renewing my expired passport.

$830. - cost to file the i600a form with USCIS, includes biometrics fee.

$5000. RT airfare for 2 adults to our destination city.

$1500. One Way children tickets to US.

$10500. Facilitation fees. 8500 for the first child, 2000 for the second. The cost of their agency fees, attorney fees, translation expenses, court expenses, etc.

$2000. - The in-country transportation expenses. A driver is assigned to take us to and from the orphanage and to all of our legal appointments. Their version of a rent-a-car.

$1500. - Required orphanage donation. 1000 for the first child, 500 for the second.

$3800. - 38 days of lodging and food expenses. Estimated 3 weeks for the adoption to happen, 10 day waiting period, 7 days to get children’s documents in order to leave the country.

$1100. - Visas and medical exams for the girls.

$1200. - Passports for the girls.

$500. - RT airfare to fly childcare (MIL) in to babysit while we are away.

$150. - Standard thank you gifts for the girls’ groupas (caretakers) and the facilitators.

Priceless - the lives of two human beings.

Calling All Fine Art Lovers

2010-07-13T00:00:00.000-07:00

Melissa at the Piano

This award winning [best of show] Cibachrome 4” x 6” framed print from artist Gail Nadeau’s 100 Angels series will look gorgeous in your livingroom. Ms. Nadeau had only 5 Cibachromes made of this mixed media artwork. This is the last one, and there will never be another one like it.

When the artist contacted me and told me that she wanted to give it to us to sell or use in any way we choose to raise funds to bring our two little girls home, I was flooded with gratitude (uh, and I admit I did spend about two minutes fantasizing about it hanging in my livingroom).

After I convinced myself not to keep it, I brainstormed ideas about what to do with it. I could sell it outright (the original price tag is $550) or I could auction it off, or I could raffle it. If I sell it or auction it off, then only those with a lot of extra money have any chance of getting it. If I raffle it off and sell a zillion tickets (here she goes fantasizing again) then that also limits your chance of owning this work of art. So what’s a girl to do?

I’ve decided on a limited raffle... selling only 250 tickets... to ensure you good odds. Raffle tickets are $10 a piece and you can buy as many as you’d like through our Chip In fund (Paypal) on the right or through Reece's Rainbow (Paypal or check, and it's tax deductible... be sure to mention that it is for Mallory & Peach). Take a chance on winning this stunning masterpiece and help save our baby girls in the process.

Gail Nadeau is an upstate New York artist whose work has been shown in numerous galleries all over the Capital region as well as in New York City and Seoul Korea. She has received multiple awards, and was recently selected as one of 10 masters by the Albany Institute of History & Art as part of their Tomorrow’s Masters Today exhibit.

And the Winners Are...

2010-07-12T13:02:00.000-07:00

Rissa Roo over at These Three Remain did a giveaway during our matching funds campaign. She held the drawing today and the winners are:

Jaqueline DiPasquale
Kelly Butler
Jennifer Baker

Head over there to see what you’ve won and find out how to claim your prize.

As Rissa Roo so eloquently put it... thanks to everyone who donated, Mallory and Peach are the real winners because you are helping to bring them home to a family who loves them.

Going Green, Sort Of

2010-07-11T17:24:00.000-07:00

Three little wet bottoms all in a row... how does your garbage grow?

I have been changing diapers non-stop for the past seven years. That is a lot of Pampers. A real lot, so many that I have enough reward points to get a Porche (ok, maybe that is wishful thinking.)

That is certainly too much non-biodegradeable landfill stuff. As each of my kids came along, I thought maybe I would try cloth and then Swaddlers turned to Cruisers and it just never happened.

Until now. I bought gDiapers. I got the disposable inserts (compostable, lol, picture that pile in my backyard!) and six organic cloth inserts. Now these diapers sure are cute and they come in all sorts of colors.

Here is what I have learned... the disposables explode long before a Cruiser would even start sagging (stop questioning my parenting skills :-) and when they explode it is like a million teensy particles stuck all over baby’s bottom, and front, and belly, and the changing table, and your hands. It is really a mess. It convinced me that the cloth inserts are the way to go.

But, eeeew cloth and poop just do not make for a fun diaper clean up. However did my mother manage? So now, I only use them after the daily package has arrived. And my husband will not use them at all (nor does he appreciate it when I use them and then leave her on his watch...)

Even so, I am going to have three little girls in diapers and my conscience just can’t shut up about landfills, so my goal is to use at least one cloth gDiaper per girl, per day. That should be manageable, and over a year that will keep 1095 Pampers out of the dump, not to mention about $350 in my purse.

Anybody else using gDiapers or any other cloth diapers? Got any pointers for me?

Peach’s Surgery

2010-07-09T14:02:00.000-07:00

Was postponed until next week.

Kimani’s heart surgery was postponed three times... originally scheduled for July 21, it didn’t happen until Sept. 24. So I ought to be used to this. But I am not.

Tomorrow

2010-07-08T13:02:00.000-07:00

Peach is scheduled for surgery tomorrow. As far as I know, it is still on. Please be praying for her tonight and for the next couple days while she is in ICU.

USCIS tells me that our I17h should be on its way to us, so it looks like our dossier will be submitted on July 16th when the government adoption office in our EE country reopens.

If all goes well, we could be on a flight as soon as the end of July.

Um, shouldn’t I be off nesting or something?

The Facilitator

2010-07-03T06:37:00.000-07:00

Just like pregnancies, all adoptions are different. In our case we have a facilitator in Eastern Europe, instead of an OBGYN, who is handling everything for us on that end. And it is a big job. He has to review our 70 or so pages of documents that make up our dossier, get them translated, act as our attorney to submit petitions, work with agencies to arrange appointments, get drivers, translators, and a place for us to stay.

Did you know that the word facile in French means easy? And facilitation means to make easier. His job is to make our adoption process easier, and let me assure you, he knows how to do his job. Within days of finding out that Peach was not registered for adoption, he had a fix in place. She will be ready when we get there.

But beyond that, Peach is scheduled for surgery on July 9th. She will have her pulmonary artery banded. This surgery, if successful, will protect Peach until she can come home and have her heart reconstructed.

Our facilitator tells me that she will be taken to the best children’s hospital in the country. His next words to me were, “I won't leave her, she will have proper care, medicines, nutrition etc.”

When I read that I was overcome with a mix of emotions and thoughts. He didn’t have to say that, he doesn’t have to do that. But he just made July 9th and the days following a lot easier for me.

It reminded me that God is the greatest facilitator of all and He, too, will be with Peach on July 9th. “As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.” Joshua 1:5

Swing Baby!

2010-06-30T11:40:00.000-07:00

There is room for two more on this play structure.

We will move forward toward both our girls. We will pray that Peach is ready to go when we get there. If she isn’t, we will go back for her. And someday I will post a picture of all five of them blissfully swinging away.

In my fantasy, our pediatric heart surgeon decides he has always wanted to go to Eastern Europe, and operating on Peach is the perfect excuse to do it. He does a little Doctors Without Borders pro-bono thing, fixes my girl and brings me back the golden coin. Then a few weeks later we fly over and scoop her and Mallory up. Everyone lives happily ever after. A girl can dream, right?

Beautiful Peach

2010-06-29T06:40:00.000-07:00

Beautiful Peach needs heart surgery yesterday.

Beautiful Peach, her heart is destroying her lungs.

Beautiful Peach, time is not on her side.

Beautiful Peach is not legally registered for adoption.

Beautiful Peach is breaking my heart.

Ready for Mallory

2010-06-27T07:23:00.000-07:00

Mallory’s crib is all set up now and waiting patiently for her. Her bedding matches Kimani’s... she has fawns and Kimani has the bunnies. The colors are the same. Since they are sharing a bedroom this works out well. The crib converts to a toddler bed but as it turns out, Mallory still sleeps in a crib. (By the way, both Mallory and Kimani can see real dear and bunnies right out that full-sized glass door in their bedroom!)

I am told that Mallory wears size 18-24 month clothing, so though she looks chunky in her pictures she is really no bigger than our two year old Kimani. She smiles a lot, understands and follows directions, imitates well, and is “self-directed”... for those of you not familiar with EI language, that means head strong and stubborn :-) She will fit right in with our family.

Here are some new pics of her...

With Grandma

I see that, like most three year olds, she likes the phone.

With Grandma and Grandpa

I am sad to take her away from those who love her, even though I know that she will be taken away to an institution on her birthday if we don’t.

Driving

Better watch your keys daddy!

Thank You

2010-06-23T07:43:00.000-07:00

During our two week $ for $ match campaign, you donated $1221.81 which automatically turned into $2443.62. We are so grateful for your generosity!

RissaRoo over at These Three Remain has a giveaway going on in our honor. All of your names will be passed to her and she will draw three from a hat. Those three will win the goodies she and A Simple Country Girl are giving away.

Because of their kindness, and yours, our donor has offered to extend the match until the close of RissaRoo’s giveaway Friday, July 2.

Thank you all so very very much. Matthew 25:40.

Grandmothers

2010-06-22T05:32:00.000-07:00

I adored my grandmother and she adored me. I was lucky to have her in my life until I was... well let's just say... all grown up. She passed away at the age of 94, one month before Kimani was born. My grandmother was always an important part of my life, a trusted confidant, a brilliant advisor, a skilled teacher, and a constant love.

I have learned that both Mallory and Peach have grandmothers who visit and love them. A great sense of joy came over me to know that these children are not forgotten by that special family matriarch. Mallory’s grandmother has indicated that she would like to receive news and pictures of Mallory as she grows up. I hope that Peach’s nana will want this as well.

For now, I am making each of them a scrapbook, a window into the life their cherished grand-daughters are coming to. It will include details about our state and city, the girls' new names and address, our family and our home, as well as the pictures of their girls that I already have. I hope these books bring peace and happiness... a tiny token of my thanks to them for their continued love in the face of what must have been nothing short of tragedy for their families.

Peach Pics

2010-06-19T05:27:00.000-07:00

Last night as I stared at these new pictures of Peach, I thought to myself in amazement, “That is my baby. How odd.” It is a strange and somewhat bewildering feeling to look at a picture of a baby you have never held, or heard, or sniffed, and know that it is your child.

Isn’t she darling?

I hope to have new pictures of Mallory soon as well. And I do have news of her, which I will share when I get pics to go with it. And, in case you are wondering, she has a lovely crib set as well, but it isn’t put together yet, so you’ll have to wait to see it.

A Very Special Gift

2010-06-18T06:53:00.000-07:00

Ruby’s big brother Grady has an amazing ability to draw. He has decided to use that talent to help save Yana, a little girl in an Eastern European orphanage who has a family committed to her. Grady is donating a custom 5x7 single subject drawing to the winner of Yana’s 100 Good Wishes fundraiser.

Here is how it works. Donate any amount to Yana’s 100 Good Wishes fund and you will be entered to win. Once the 100 wishes are filled, Lisa (Yana’s mama) will put all the donor’s names it a hat and select a winner. The winner gets to send a photo to Grady and he will create a gorgeous, one-of-a-kind graphite pencil drawn replica of it. This gift is valued at $100.

Don’t miss your chance to win something special from this up and coming amazing artist. Check out more of Grady’s work on his blog, The Way of the Pencil.

Ready for Peach

2010-06-16T17:44:00.000-07:00

I learned a while ago that God cares what I choose for my baby’s nursery decor. So this time there was no hesitation about choosing something special and organic for Peach. No, this time the question was, should we do this before we know for sure that she will live to sleep in it?

On faith, we have chosen to get the crib all ready for Peach. Kimani was even kind enough to try it out for her. What a good big sister she will be ♥

What’s a Waiting Mom To Do?

2010-06-13T07:25:00.000-07:00

When I was pregnant I spent my days eating healthy food, drinking lots of water, taking prenatal vitamins, and rubbing my big belly as I talked sweet nothings to the little one inside. Even during my pregnancy with Kimani when I knew there was a heart defect and the 80% chance of Down syndrome, still I was in control of what was going on with her day-to-day as I waited. I was meeting all her needs with the best of everything.

But now as I wait for my babies, I cannot feed them or comfort them. I cannot meet their needs and protect them. And I can’t rush Peach to the pediatric surgeon who can save her life, the same one that saved Kimani’s life. All I can do is chase down paperwork and wait and pray for them.

And I can shop for them :-) You see, when we finally fly over there to appear in court before the judge who will decide to make them our daughters, we will have to leave without them. That’s right. There is a 10 day waiting period after an adoption. A period that exists so that someone (an extended family member maybe?) can come forward and ask to stop the adoption. Once that period passes, we can fly back over and get our girls, then get their visas and passports, and bring them home.

So I bought them each a lovey doll, both Pooh bears, to hold onto during the waiting period. Something soft and comforting to remind them that mama and papa have not deserted them. Little Pooh bears as a promise of our return for them.

Which girl gets which bear? I don’t know. Why don’t you tell me :-)

The Schedule Thusfar

2010-06-11T17:27:00.000-07:00

The number one question we get asked is “When do you expect to get the girls?” I don’t have an exact answer but I can tell you where we are at in the process.

February 27th: We found Arina on Reece’s Rainbow and decided to adopt her.

March 8th: We found Ametz/JCCA an accredited homestudy agency that met the necessary requirements.

From March 10 to March 31: We all visited doctors, had TB tests done, secured numerous documents, got fingerprinted, and did the 10 hour required international adoption parent training.

April 1: We had our homestudy visit and interviews.

May 14: We found out that Arina was no longer available for adoption. No one knows why. Perhaps she has already been adopted, or a family member came back for her. Or maybe she is in Heaven with God.

May 17: Andrea sent info about a baby named Peach who needs a family ASAP. Peach has a serious heart defect and will require immediate surgery once she gets to the US.

Later on May 17 Andrea sent pictures of an adorable three year old who is in the same baby house. She offered us the 2-for-1 special (just kidding :-)

May 18: We let Andrea know that we would take both Peach and Mallory.

May 20: We sent our promise trust and RR love offering.

May 25-present: Putting together our dossier. More trips to the doctor, blood lab, personnel office, fingerprinting office, town and county offices for deed, marriage certificates, birth certificates, etc. Visited the State Dept. for necessary document apostilles.

May 27: We received our completed homestudy.

June 3: Got fingerprinted again for state clearance letters. Over-nighted our i600a (petition to adopt an international orphan) forms to the United States Citizenship and Immigration Service.

June 4: FedEx’d our power-of-attorney forms and petitions to our facilitator and legal representative in the Eastern European country we are adopting from.

This week we have been chasing down more paperwork, and we are almost DONE with that :-)

I don't want to jinx things but I would guess that we will be on our way to get our girls over the summer.

Here is where I want to send some love and thanks to my online sisters who have been with me, listening to me stress, sharing good advice and more, and just showing me an amazing amount of love and encouragement throughout this crazy journey.

Jennifer from Three’s a Charm and Saving Sofia

Lisa from Bridget’s Light and Loving Alina

And, my “blood brother,” Lisa from Genetically Enhanced

The Most Beautiful Orphan

2010-06-09T20:11:00.000-07:00

The most beautiful orphan I have ever seen is in this video. She debuts at 5:21 and then makes a second darling appearance at 7:27.

Beautiful Orphan Girl

Wow, $ for $ Donation Match

2010-06-08T06:47:00.000-07:00

A generous donor has offered to match any donations made to our adoption fund, dollar for dollar up to $5000. For the next two weeks anything you give toward saving our girls gets doubled. How awesome is that?

No matter if you use our Chip In fund on the blog, or make a tax-deductible gift through our Reece's Rainbow family adoption grant fund, our donor will match it! So if you are considering helping to save Mallory and Peach, now is a great time to act.

We want to take a moment to thank those who have already donated. These are tough times and that makes your gifts extra meaningful. We pray that God blesses you for your kindness.

(Thanks to RissaRoo and her giveaway, the match has been extended until July 2.)

What’s In a Name?

2010-06-06T11:09:00.000-07:00

I’ll bet you’ve guessed that our two little girls in Eastern Europe were not originally named Mallory and Peach, and if so, you are correct. For many reasons the children on Reece’s Rainbow are often given aliases and such is our case.

Mallory’s name given to her by her parents means bitterness. I felt sad for her parents when I found that out. I tried to imagine their shock and sorrow when the child they waited for in a happy state of anticipation was born with Down syndrome. In their culture, there is no place for a child like Mallory. There is no support for parents who want to keep a child like her.

Bitterness... an intense feeling, perhaps a combination of sorrow and anger, causing sour bile to rise in the back of one’s throat. I will never know how hard it must have been to turn away from Mallory, to sign her life away to strangers. But I can understand her parents marking her with a name that encompassed all that they felt.

She will keep her first name. It is the only thing she has in this world that belongs to her. She is three years old and knows her name. I would not take that from her.

As for Princess Peach (there’s a whole lot of Mario in our house ;-) her given name means holy. I wonder if her parents knew that, if they intentionally named her with that meaning in mind. My guess is that they were told she was going to die. Maybe they knew that to put her up for adoption was to give her a chance at a life-saving surgery. Maybe they pray for her everyday.

Soon Peach will have a chance to live, and soon she will reborn with a new name.

How Does One Choose a Child?

2010-05-26T20:59:00.000-07:00

We didn’t know the answer.

Staring at sweet faces, perusing profiles for birth stats and medical info, trying to make sense of it all... orphans... left behind because of their disabilities. Which one was meant to be my child? I stressed, I cried, I prayed for peace.

In February, I found Arina from Russia. In all my visits to RR I had never seen her before and something about her struck me. I wondered if I had found my baby. I googled her name. It is Greek and means “peace”.

Our family agreed that she was meant to be ours and we initiated the adoption process. I’ll skip the parts about the placement agency stringing us along for ten weeks... Finally another placement agency delivered the news that Arina was no longer available. We will never know why. A hard and tear-filled weekend followed.

I thought about our selection process... about why I was even trying to choose a child... about why we were adopting... I was looking for an augury... pictures, birthdays, names... divine guidance of a sort. I was looking for the perfect child for us. How typical of me to want to do God’s work my way.

On the following Monday, Andrea contacted us about Peach. While my husband and I were talking it over, she emailed about Mallory. We weren’t looking at three year olds. We weren’t looking for an infant with a life-threatening heart defect. We weren’t looking for two children.

But then again, when I was pregnant with our babies, we weren’t “looking” for any specific child. We were ready and willing to take the children God sent to us. We talked about this, together realizing that we were not able to know how to choose a child and so we trusted that God had chosen for us (um, no, I’m not saying Andrea is God, though she sure is his hands and feet.)

Once we decided to take them, I was overwhelmed with love for them and my husband was filled with hope for them. With love and hope came peace, and so my prayer was answered after all.

Who Are Mallory and Peach?

2010-05-19T09:22:00.000-07:00

Mallory and Peach are two little girls with much in common. They were both born with an extra chromosome, resulting in Down syndrome, and they were both abandoned at birth because of it. They now live together on borrowed time in an Eastern European orphanage.

Mallory is three years old. She has huge blue eyes and a charming grin. When an orphan child with Down syndrome in Eastern Europe turns four, she is transferred to a mental institution where she is left to live out the rest of her life. But that will not be Mallory’s story. Beautiful, gifted Mallory will be coming home to us to take her place as a valued daughter and sister.

Peach is just about 7 months old. She has a very serious heart defect that requires surgery ASAP. Her doctors do not believe that she will live through the surgery unless it is performed by an experienced pediatric cardiac surgeon like those available in the USA. This little darling is beating the odds everyday and we pray that we get her home in time to save her life.

Right now, Mallory and Peach are orphans, far from our love, but still they are children of God and He has not forgotten them. Soon these little girls will have a mommy and daddy, sisters and brothers, grandmas and grandpas, aunts, uncles, cousins, and a whole circle of friends. They will have good nutrition, quality family time, affection galore, and access to excellent health care. They will blossom into the sweet blessings God designed them to be and we will have the joy of being a part of their lives.